Just because Jake Gyllenhaal’s dating Reese Witherspoon, doesn’t mean you should be fooled into thinking he’s straight. Any straight or gay dude would date her, or Alexis Bledel, or Hayden Panettiere.
No, my instincts tell me that our boy Jake Gyllenhaal is as gay as they come. Ladies, my heart goes out to you and ya’ll have my deepest of sympathies. Enjoy the HQ pictures of Jake and remember, click to enlarge!
FYI, Jake Gyllenhaal will play the Prince of Persia in an upcoming movie coincidentally entitled Prince of Persia and though I may like the dude, you can’t tell me this doesn’t look like the gayest beefcake movie hero ever.
The cast of Disney’s High School Musical 3 touched down in Paris to promote their new movie! Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens are easily the headline here, but Ashley Tisdale and the black guy nonetheless tried to get a little spotlight for themselves too.
Does anyone else find it crushingly depressing how hard Disney pimps out their stars? Sure, fame and money is good and all, but it seems like once Disney discovered the goldmine that is Miley Cyrus aka: Hannah Montana, the company’s become intent on drilling all their kids (no pun intended) until the well’s dry.
Katy Perry was looking hot and stunning at a Christian Dior fashion show yesterday, it’s just too bad she brought a homeless guy with her. Wait? What!? That’s her boyfriend, Travis McCoy!? Really!? Wow…
See ya later folks, I’m moving to Hollywood where even the ugliest and smelliest of dudes can get the hottest of girls!
Speaking of newlyweds, Ellen DeGeneres who recently married her longtime GF Portia de Rossi, was spotted hanging out with none other than the infamous Paris Hilton!?
On my list of favorite celebrites, I’d have to say Ellen DeGeneres is right up there with Jon Stewart and Harrison Ford, so why she’s hanging out with Paris Hilton is absolutely beyond me. Could it possibly be that Paris Hilton is “good people”?
Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson were married in BC, Canada on the weekend and all I can say is poor, poor Ryan. Sure, right now Scarlett Johansson may one of the hot and sexy girls in Hollywood, but let me tell you that in a couple years those gorgeous melons are gonna sag down to her knees and Ryan will be stuck with a saggy Bilbo Baggins.
That being said, there’s worse things than being married to those boobs. I just haven’t decided whether or not I’m jealous yet, y’know?
Daniel Radcliffe debuted his play Equus on Broadway last night and as these pictures document, it was an exciting affair. I’m not saying the director is a bad man, but obese old dudes with scraggily facial hair have always given me the willies, though I apologize if you have a thing for obese old dudes with scraggily facial and this post offended you.
Pedophiles are people too, even if they’re directors.
Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson relaxed in Disneyland to avoid the crazy rantings of Lindsay’s retarded fame whore father who insists DJ Samantha Ronson is the cause of all of his daughters problems.
So, as we’ve done with scientologist cultists Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes, and Will Smith, Michael Lohan is hereby banned from any postings on Iamnoisy.com for being such an idiot. How this guy even figured out how to have kids is beyond me.
That’s it for today, so enjoy the beautful weather and I’ll catch up with you tomorrow after I wash off the stink of this story…
Miley Cyrus and her new fame whore boyfriend, Justin Gaston, attended a Pussycat Dolls show yesterday. When Justin was asked what base he’s gotten to with Miley, he simply responded:
Miley Cyrus is a beautiful human being and I have no plans to engage in a physical relationship with her until marriage. Also, that bitch better make me rich and famous or I’ll smack her brains out!*
*the above quoted text may or may not be an actual quote from the douchebag Miley Cyrus’ boyfriend, Justin Gaston.
On a sidenote, has anyone here seen Disney’s Beauty and the Beast? Anyone remember a guy named Gaston somewhere in there? Hmm…
I don’t believe it. Clay Aiken, the one man I truly look up to has come out of the closet and finally announced his gayness. Confirmed that his smooth porcelain skin was never for the touch of a woman, that his long slender fingers shall never grazed the fairer sex, that- dude, he f*cks guys. Do you really care enough to read all of this?
The world’s abuzz after Lindsay Lohan confirmed her relationship with Samantha Ronson to “Love Line” in the video below!
Wait…
I didn’t hear any solid confirmation there. Did you? All I heard was Sam Ronson sound like a good and decent human being when she spoke compassionately about an injured friend, and then some boring conversation with Lindsay Lohan. Whatever.
I’m just glad Lindsay Lohan’s finally dating a person with a soul. Say what you will about the pair, I like Samantha Ronson, and I like this couple. Not as much as I like Oreo’s or cupcakes, but they’re a-ok a far as I’m concened with celebrity couples (which ain’t so much).
