envy! justin timberlake is shooting the new mike myers movie, the love guru, in toronto and not only will jesssica alba play the role of his girlfriend, jessica biel is in town to ensure alba doesn’t steal her man!

timberlake was gandhi in a previous life. there is no other explanation. a man dreams of being surrounded by beautiful women but for timberlake it’s passe, not even interesting. i bet you forty-six billion dollars the dude’s gay by the end of filming cause he’s now had it all.

ps: gandhi was racist and a bad person. he’s an asshole. whatever. forget him. you get my point.

blah. the once young’n peppy britney spears has been going through a particularly rough patch as of late and wwtdd summarizes it all oh so very well here. i kinda know what she’s going through though ’cause this one time i offered this cute gal a cigarette and she said yes and then we had sex and then i woke up and discovered that it wasn’t a cute gal, but an assorted variety of philosophy text books i had f*cked. i don’t know how that happened, is this sh*t even possible!? i thought.

so yeah, that must be what britney’s thinkin about her life right about now, no?

damn. justin timberlake strained his vocal chords at vmas and had to visit hospital…with jessica biel! i hate this guy! there is nothing bad about being him! if i were himself i would swallow an entire lead pipe just to go back into hospital with her! …i seriously need to reevaluate my life.